Surviving My Life

26. T-Minus 14.

Saturdays. Days off from work. The official day of "Sleeping In" and of doing what you want.

Days of complete boredom for me.

As much as I would love to say that "all I need is God", I can't. I need more. Someone to talk to would be nice. It would have to be a girl. Attractive. Oh, and she would have to like to laugh.

In 14 days, and 5 hours I'll be 26.

Gosh. 26.

Past the centerline of youth. 26 is officially closer to 30 than it is to 20.

I don't know. Maybe I'm just tired. But thinking of being 26 makes me depressed. I have nothing to show that my life has accomplished anything. I have nothing of value. No wife. No kids. No great job.

I'm single, living alone, with a lousy part time crappy job that pays me nothing, trying to figure out how to take what I have and pay bills that I cannot afford.

It makes me laugh. Take a picture of my life. It looks like the arial view of a train wreck.

Traditionally, I'm not a depressed person. I don't get depressed easily. In fact, you'll find that posts like this are always in the middle of the night - when it's quiet. When the tv is off, and the silence in my apartment brings to rememberance better times - and better places. When I realize that nobody special is calling to check up on me. And that tomorrow is a day filled with more of the same.

I find it funny when I hear people say "Pray. God is all you need." That's not true. He's not all I need.

Genesis 2:18 - "And the LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a companion who will help him."

So where's myhelper?

Bah. I don't even know what I write in this thing. I feel like an idiot.

Then I realize - it's because I don't have anyone else to talk to except for my computer.

If someone could tell me if Wal*Mart has a sale on "Helpers", or know of any good paying Web/Video/Graphic Design jobs, I'd appretiate it. I could use the help.

Figures.

posted by Jeremiah @ 02:07